Firstly I have to apologise for not being around and posting. It’s been a busy and stressful few weeks. I made the decision to return to work at the beginning of June. Although I didn’t feel 100% by any means, my mood has been good. The main issue has continued to be fatigue due to the Anaemia and general poor sleep.
It’s not proven easy by any means. Luckily I am on a phased return so am doing reduced hours and have a reduced workload, but I’ve been struggling. Today has been the first day I haven’t come home and gone to sleep!! I talked about returning to work in my last counselling session and we agreed that, whilst I get back into work and the routine, I may need to rest and not do other things in the evenings. I’ve done what I can and what I have the energy to do, but no more. The whole thing is a challenge for the family.
It’s also meant that everything has come to a bit of a standstill in terms of simplifying my life…..although maybe just accepting the need to rest rather than forcing myself to continue is actually part of living a ‘simple life.‘ At the moment I feel that I have so much to do and catch up with that it could easily become over-whelming. However I think the change in mindset I have, realising I can’t do it all and that I don’t need to be perfect, has really helped. I’m not berating myself anymore or feeling like I’m useless…..and do you know what I’ve realised? The world isn’t falling apart!!!!!
To be realistic at the moment, I think I will post weekly. I’m also trying to fit in an online course, when I have the energy, so there is a lot for me to be getting on with. I have also been doing an introduction to Buddhism and Meditation course which has been fantastic and so helpful!! It’s certainly something I’ll continue.
Had a nice moment at work today….I was thanked by a family member for doing a really good and thorough assessment of her son and his needs. The man had engaged really well and been very open and honest…..that’s the great part of my job, when you feel that you’ve done something worthwhile and meaningful. Unfortunately the NHS and staff working in it don’t always hear praise and thanks…..so when we do it’s what makes the job even more rewarding and enjoyable. It reminded me of the reason I went into it in the first place!!!!
My weekly post will hopefully be over the weekend, as this is when I have the most time and energy!