Can’t quite believe I’m actually saying this…..but I’ve now had two good days in a row!! Now I know, through the many people I’ve nursed with Depression, that this is no guarantee that every day that follows will be good. However, they are the best days I’ve had in a long, long time and I have to say it feels great! I’ve had energy, been laughing and joking with the family and even put my phone on ‘Do Not Disturb’ for a couple of hours this evening whilst we played Trivial Pursuit!! It’s been a lovely day all round!
What I made sure to do was to ensure I fitted in an hour to rest….this is going to have to be one of my priorities. I know what I’m like, and now I’m feeling a bit better and have a bit more motivation, I might just throw myself into everything and end up totally overdoing it. I can’t afford to do that any more, I know now that I need to pace myself and factor in time for self-care.
I’ve been doing a 5 day challenge through Facebook around productivity. I’m such a nerd…I love that kind of stuff. It’s certainly helped me to think about how I need to plan my days going forward, what my priorities need to be and how to ensure I make time for them. I have to get on top of this before I can go back to work…because if I’m not 100% then I know that the work pressure will just knock me down again.
It’s so frustrating to go from being someone who was very organised and productive, to someone with no energy, a crap memory and no drive or interest in doing anything. I’ve beaten myself up, felt a failure, wondered why on earth I just can’t sort myself out and been angry with myself….but I’m trying so hard to stop with the self-criticism. I don’t deserve it, I’m realising that now. I really think that this period of my life, and what I’ve learnt, will help me in the future.
3 things I’m grateful for:
- Time with my kids playing Trivial Pursuit – happy days.
- Coffee – say no more.
- Sunshine in-between the rain showers.
I originally started this blog with the aim to try and simplify my life….I have to say the last year has been anything but simple. It’s been the hardest time I’ve ever been through. However, I’m now going to start working towards the future…and so simplifying my life is going to be vital in those plans. I really need to declutter, get rid of the excess and organise my life…..at least I’m beginning to feel that I can dip my toe in the water again now.
Any comments or advice would be most welcome……